Cat Haters Gifts

"We finally found something in common - we all hate that stupid cat of yours."

Biofelineism

Cat with Lion reflection in mirror

"Are there treats? Just grab the treats and get outta there!"

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

Couple sitting in living room reading books while dog reads a book with a cat shaped cover.

What does aloof mean?

"We need volunteers for the car chasing fundraiser."

"Well, it's disappointing: Young Master seems to use the term 'best friend' for anybody who pays him the slightest attention..."

How Amazon was invented

"No, being declawed is the opposite of being a cyborg!"

"You're completely screwed up."

'Well, back to the old drawing board.'

"In other news a new study indicates dogs are still better than cats."

Cat laughs at 'Ameowsing Cat Jokes.'

Mog The Week

"You're adopted."

"I wish I could lay there all day watching funny cat videos..."

"You will meet a tall, mysterious stranger — you will rub fur on his pant leg."

I'm sure it's fake.

'Oh no! That's not litter! It's quicksand!!'

Guard dogs

The lap dog, I can work around. The laptop cat, not so much.

"Chasing squirrels is more art than science."

"Slippery, huh?"

'I've never found anything else that bugs you so much with so little effort.'

"You're kidding, right?"

'Those aren't sprinkles! they're FLEAS!!!! 'I made it from scratch.'

Alice in Wonderland - Alice Meets the Cheshire Cat.

Catroom.

'How long have you had this obsessive hatred of cats?'

'Very nice, but is there room to swing a cat?'

'I think we need to do some updated x-rays - these appear to be four lives ago, Mr. Jingles.'

"Listen, that's a Tang Dynasty urn we just broke."

"The director told me we were going to green-screen the cat in!"