Cat Entertainer Gifts

'Isn't he sweet - he got down all by himself!'

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

Cat Reunion

"The painting and pillows were his idea. The scratches were mine."

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

"Projectile hairballing."

"What we're looking for is someone who think outside the box?"

"I now what you've come to expect from me is physical comedy, but tonight I thought we'd try something a little different."

Cat holds sign which says - Will purr for food.

"There HAS to be a giant ball at the end of all this string."

"But some of my best ideas come while I'm in the litter box."

"You shouldn't have hypnotised him"

'Now cut that out!'

'What? I'm scratching the sofa! I'm not! And if I was? It's your fault!'

'Man it's a tough crowd tonight!'

"I hate it..."

'Oh, this will be good! He just putted into a sand trap...our litter box.'

'I'm a lap cat. So, naturally I prefer a laptop.'

Litter Box Logistics Ltd.

'Yeah, I'm a mouser.'

Litter Tray Stonehenge

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

"What SPF sunscreen do you suggest for lying around in a sunny spot?"

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Pied Piper

"GPS? In case we get lost? Why would we need that? We're microchipped."

"Ever wonder where all those cat videos come from?"

Cat Lover's Leap.

'I don't mind you singing, but I draw the line at your banjo playing.'

Cat on a psychiatrist's couch: 'Truth is, I'm not really a cat person.'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Balloon

'Who did you have lick your hair?'

"He's a rescue, and before that he was in Vaudeville."

Owner Rolls Out Red Carpet For Large Cat

The Curiosity Mars rover is seen killing a cat: 'Mission accomplished.'