Cat Commander Gifts

Cat Up Tree - "He refuses to come down unless you agree to all his demands."

"What part of 'giddyup' don't you understand?"

Man salutes as cat walks in.

'That will do slave.'

The household pecking order.

Cat in a tank...

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

'It's okay - he knows how to use the GPS.'

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

The First Martian Dog.

"I'm seeing some dominance issues."

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

"He's got no idea how to run a Husky team."

"I'm not telling you to stay. I'm talking to the stock market."

'Get up or I'm sending in the cat.'

Dog with Anchor Lead

'I do not pamper the dog, now get out of his chair!'

Dog training

"Wait a minute. Have you guys thought about how this thing is supposed to fit in there?"

'Now listen: Based on the position of the kennel and the length of the leash, only the shaded part of the garden is dangerous...'

'Well it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

After bring your cat to work day, I ended up with 5 extra cats.

'I'm sure they don't think you're really a bad kitty...just a kitty that sometimes does bad things.'

Top dogs IN and OUT trays

"I'm beginning to worry she might work out who is really in charge."

"He's our finest service animal."

"Whoa. Nap time again. Meeting adjourned."

Dog walker / Cat walker.

'Well it's about time! My belly needs scratching.'

'What am I doing here? I'm a cat. I don't know anything about running a major corporation!'

Self-Employment

'Yep. I used to use chemical to strip wallpaper, but the cats are more efficient, and there's no nasty smell.'

'The speaker for tonight's ceremony will be our valedictorian. Speak, boy, speak.'

Monk & Mandi: "I only obey twice a day."