Kitty Commander Gifts

"I have to go – it's time to feed the cat."

Great works of fiction - show your cat who's boss.

Cat in a tank...

Mittens is challenged by the string.

'Oh no, it's the Burkes! You stall them here while I go fix my hair and don't let them roam around. Remember, once you have cockroaches in your kitchen, you'll never get rid of them.'

"What part of 'giddyup' don't you understand?"

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

Internet Cafe.

Model Nato Afghanistan Army

Computer hacker sends a rocket to Mars.

"Ramming Speed!"

"GPS? In case we get lost? Why would we need that? We're microchipped."

Bored Baker

Why cat yoga classes don't work

'I'm a bit suspicious of that Trojan Clothes horse.'

Raccoons! Single file into the crate! Snake! Back in your hole! Crickets! Keep it down! Animal Control Freak.

Cat Up Tree - "He refuses to come down unless you agree to all his demands."

'I've had four litters and I don't get as much as a head butt on Mothers Day.'

"Sometimes I think the captain doesn't appreciate the seriousness of military maneuvers."

'We named him 'Raisin Bran.' Every morning in the litter box, it's two scoops!'

Possum Army HQ. Here's the casualty report, sir --- You have to take it with a grain of salt, of course.

'You remembered to bake it BEFORE the stripper got in, right?'

"There he goes, filling their heads with ludicrous conspiracy theories about microchip implants and mass sterilisation programmes…"

Harper's Cat Speaks: 'To whom it may concern: I will be cutting down on kitty treats.'

Helicopter Mom

"I hear you're having trouble keeping up with the rest of your platoon. What seems to be the problem, private?"

"These IT guys are really intimidating I mean just look at the focus the concentration...I wonder what he's working on?"

Cat Philosophers

'Son, you're old enough now to know the truth...The red dot...It isn't real.'

"Sit on her chest and stare at her or knock things off the dresser. How do you wake your owner?"

"Uh - Oh, here comes old sourpuss."

Man salutes as cat walks in.

Navy games.

'No more litter boxes for us! We trained the cat to use the toilet.'