Casual Cynics Pillows

'Do I have to say a prayer even if I don't need anything?'

Rich man vomiting euros to a beggar.

'Everything is illusory? -- Even reality shows?'

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

'I'm still employed, but to save on utility costs, they offshored me.'

"It's a great story, funny and entertaining - and better still it's not won a single prize for literature."

"Life sucks and then you keep living."

Federal Bureau of Do As We Say, NOT As We Do!

'You'll have to excuse my husband - he's got compassion fatigue.'

'Here - The Royal Safety Council said you have to wear this.'

"Oh, the usual bills and a friendly reminder from Satan that there's a special place in Hell reserved just for us, but only if we ACT NOW, blah, blah, blah."

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

"You seem to have the right combination of bitterness, pessimism, and caffeine consumption that we're looking for."

"Every complaint should be seen as a learning opportunity, today you’re going to learn where to hide them."

"And in this section it appears that you have not only alienated voters but actually infected them, too."

'Our government is comprised of three branches - politicians, lobbyists, and the media.'

'The following program may not be suitable for those of you who are sick and tired of politics....'

'These are fine, but what's in it for me?'

Mail & Political lies.

"You can't put a price on all those years of marriage." "Au contraire!"

"Did he give it all to the poor, or just the after salary and expenses part?"

Corrupted Politicians

"The difference between criminal geniuses and politicians is none of them are geniuses."

'Help me, Helen! I'm feeling a momentary lapse of cynicism!'