Comedic Cynics Pillows

Hypochondriac center - We pretend to care.

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

'Everything is illusory? -- Even reality shows?'

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

"Call me 'pops' one more time and I'll lace 'ya one!"

"She bathes him. She feeds him. She burps him. Mother's a real micromanager."

"Boss, the customers can hear you cackling maniacally." "I've topped myself, minion." "It's not enough to run ads that tout our own excellence: we have to simultaneously tear down the competition." "Behold: my masterpiece." "'100 percent of those who drink Coffee King’s coffee will die.'" "Best part is it’s technically true."

The Nihilist Deli.

"Right. Women adore him, men want to be like him, and YOU... well, you're hopeless. So, am I the ONLY one who sees through this guy?"

Pop up begger.

"Please excuse our appearance while our records are being impounded."

"The school construction budget is so small we can't even afford to build a snowman."

Federal Bureau of Do As We Say, NOT As We Do!

Obama builds own gallows.

"Do I take it that we can't be guaranteed your vote in the forthcoming election?"

'It's bad enough I get overrules at home... why here also, Sharon?'

'Here - The Royal Safety Council said you have to wear this.'

"And in this section it appears that you have not only alienated voters but actually infected them, too."

London Congestion & Polution Zone - 'What's your problem? I thought Boris was in charge now.'

"Oh, the usual bills and a friendly reminder from Satan that there's a special place in Hell reserved just for us, but only if we ACT NOW, blah, blah, blah."

'It just seem excessive, somehow -- buying a big-screen, high-definition TV to watch Geraldo with.'

"Excuse me - could you tell me which recession we are in at the moment?"

"Let me get this straight - You're divorcing him because of a fortune cookie message?"

'Our government is comprised of three branches - politicians, lobbyists, and the media.'

Safety Pin

'These are fine, but what's in it for me?'

'The following program may not be suitable for those of you who are sick and tired of politics....'

End of the Pier Show

Two women are hosting a radio show called Ask Sadie.