Castle Sieges Gifts

"Why is humor your only defense mechanism?"

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

'We're gonna need a bigger moat...!'

"He's his own worst enemy."

"Early model of baggage claim"

Building Sandcastles.

'Too late...looks like they've already been pillaged.'

"Hurry up with that dictionary!"

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

Bubble; 'This castle manager job better be for real.'

Welcome Ghost.

'Damn, I knew that disabled access would be our undoing.'

Clearing the castle's moat.

'So far we're holding off overseas competition.'

Fairytale prince and princess

"You fools! That's not the boiling oil, that's my beef casserole!"

"Never gonna give thou up -- Never gonna let thou down -- Never gonna run around and desert thouuuuuu."

'Rapunzel, Rapunzel! Let down your hair extensions.'

Knight walking a dog.

'Is "I'll huff and I'll puff till I blow your castle down" the best intimidation we can come up with!!'

"We'll settle this the old-fashioned way - with a dance-off."

"Today we're going to talk about lowering the drawbridge."

"Hang on a tick, lads, what have we here?"

"The peasants have lost all respect for the moat."

"It's the battering classes"

Beware of the Dragon

'A-1 security from crime ... but can't stand the isolation.'

"This spectacular 40 room property has majestic views of the valley and village and it was tastefully renovated after the most recent Viking incursion."