Carnival Enthusiast Gifts

"It doesn't mean I'm a sad clown. It means I killed a man in prison."

Test your patience, back in one hour.

"Two minutes, 40 seconds. Next ... Two minutes, 53 seconds. Next ..."

"Guess your weight gain since you've been here"

Scary rides down at the job fair.

Guess your weight-related illness.

"I just want to apologize beforehand if you miss."

A electrically-powered man checks tickets on the bumper cars.

Children must be this tall to ride, adults must be this thin.

Circle the wagons!

"Watch BoBo the Clown cry real tears of existential crisis only to refocus his energy through sublimation and laugh at the inherent indifference and absurdity of existence."

Humiliate the clown till he dunks himself.

'Is it just me or are things getting easier these days?'

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

Ferris Wheel set on High Speed.

In the back of his mind, Billy realized this would be his pièce de résistance.

'Stop the world... I wanna get off!'

At the coconut shy - "See.. I told you it was a stupid haircut."

"And that was with the handbrake on!"

LAST WHACK-A-MOLE FOR 500 MILES.

'I see they've had their health and safety inspection.'

"You have to shake it up if you want to see it snow again."

'Relax, Julie, you haven't gained weight. That's a funhouse mirror I put up to remind myself not to pig out.'

Fortune Teller looks aghast at what she shes in her crystal ball.

'Okay, on the count of three we fight back. One. . . Two. . .'

'Tastes like rubber chicken.'

Face Painting.

Guess your Weight Discuss the Health Risks Formulate an Exercise Plan.

"Oi! Can't you see I've already got a fair in the back?!"

'It's cotton candy taken to the next level, it's polyester candy.'

"Step right up and save a baby whale's life."

"If anything happens, Janice, I love you."

"Then, business is bad all over."

"I told you I would turn the company around!"

A fairground attraction