Career Hopefuls Gifts

"These are the people I hate dealing with...buried in debt unsure about their futures, no hopes or prospects."

'You need an education or you will wind up in some fast food place.'

"If I made as much as him, I could retire in a couple of days"

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

Little Doctor meets Little Geneticists.

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

In addition to brilliant grades and perfect SATs � Parents' night. College admissions. Your child should excel at 3 sports and lead a school extra-curricular like the newspaper. Don't the arts count? Sure! If your child sings, for example � A part on 'Glee' or in the Metropolitan Opera would certainly help. Our kids are doomed.

'I'm not sure what I want out of life, but I want a lot of it.'

What will the little one be? Epidemiologist? Virologist? PPE manufacturer?

'I fetch, but it hasn't helped my career any.'

"Todd was glad he had a support animal."

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

"I always wanted to work with animals."

'Nice work, kid. Looks like you might be ready to sit up at the big boys' table.'

'I wish I were your age again, and knew what I know now.'

The 5 paragraph essay is sooo stupid. Why do we have to learn it? So you can get good SAT scores. That will get you into a good college, and then a good job. So you never have to write another 5-paragraph essay again.

'Get out there and keep your job!'

"One day she'll be a wonderful architect."

I'm willing to start at the bottom and work my way up to your job..

Man looking at company organisation chart, he's at the very bottom.

'hard work and more hard work got me where I am today...Not my hard work of course.'

The Further Temptations of Kenneth Starr

"Excuse me, Mr Newton, but some of the employees think that your promotion has gone to your head."

"With Harry all options are on the table, including pointlessly looking for a job that doesn't exist for him anymore."

'I got an 'F' in penmanship, but it doesn't matter. I plan on becoming a doctor.'

"And someday, when you're a little further up the corporate ladder, maybe we'll let you meet J.R. himself!"

'Junior wrote his first memo today!'

"Well, once you get your PhD on 'The Return of the Repressed in Early Jacobean Drama', then we;ll discuss how disappointed you are."

'Introducing one of our top salesmen despite his old age. . .'

'But Marvin, you can't be a college graduate for a living!'

'Of course you can make a great career here! Look at me - when I started working, I was just called 'dude'. Now, only 25 years later, they call me 'MISTER dude'!'

'Where do you expect to see yourself in five lifetimes?'

"Remember, son, you can be anything you want to be...except for maybe an aroma therapist."

'When I grow up, Grandpa, I want to be just like you...retired!'