Car Jokester Gifts

'Power steering.'

Car Rental: 'Just be glad it's once a year.'

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

CLEAR!

Prepare to meet thy mechanic.

Volkswagen Scandal

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

'Beware of SUV.'

"Don't you ever run off again to get your oil changed without telling me."

"This is Siri. No, you're not there yet!"

'Oh I could fix it for under fifty bucks, but I just couldn't live with myself knowing that someday you might need a whole new engine.'

'You need orthopedic brake shoes.'

If a motorist came bursting through the doors...would he be up for damages?

'If I were you, I'd leave the keys in the ignition and hope someone steals it.'

"Your new car won't start? Oh, well, umm…that's just the car's Collision Avoidance System kicking in. It doesn't want you to hit anything today."

Person who refuses to admit age on board. Feel free to drive with wild and reckless abandon.

No U-turns

Australian Sat Nav - 'Straight on mate'.

Pine tree driving a truck with a human-shaped air freshener hanging off the mirror

"It's a hybrid if you think it is. Runs on gas and the power of positive thinking."

"So tell me about your early years on the road..."

"..and I've recently had it converted to LGP"

My car idles well! It learned a lot from you!

"I got a 'millennial anti-theft device' in my car." "Steering wheel lock?" "Stick shift."

'Why can't you ride under the dash like other airbags?'

Driver with a rear view mirror attached to his forehead.

Road rage in the car-to-car technology era.

Tin man visits automotive oil change facility.

Parking? I don't think so.

'This model runs on antibiotics.'

It's just until I stop chasing cars.

"Yes, it does come with a tech package. It's called a battery."

Getting the Finger

'I don't need a computer to tell me I failed to fasten my seat belt or release the emergency brake.'