Jokester With A Car Theme Gifts

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

'McWit, that's not what's meant by carbo loading.'

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

'Beware of SUV.'

"Okay...just this once...but no more practice swings!"

If a motorist came bursting through the doors...would he be up for damages?

'You need orthopedic brake shoes.'

'If I were you, I'd leave the keys in the ignition and hope someone steals it.'

'Power steering.'

Person who refuses to admit age on board. Feel free to drive with wild and reckless abandon.

Australian Sat Nav - 'Straight on mate'.

'Why can't you ride under the dash like other airbags?'

Driver with a rear view mirror attached to his forehead.

'This model runs on antibiotics.'

Getting the Finger

The Magician world's version of Fluffy dice.

"I hate it hen the red oil light comes on!"

Other decals on cars.

"It will cost $1,200 to fix that dent...or I could just make an identical dent on the other side for $19.99."

Out of Bumper Stickers.

'Automobilia Now: Lemon and Lemonaid.

"Do I know how fast I was going? Isn't that your job?"

"When I asked to see your licence I meant your driving licence, not your dog licence."

'Thank goodness I remembered to bring those spares!'

"The worst thing about selling electric cars? The jokes about sticker shock."

"Honk if you think I'm about to cause an accident."

"Sir, I'm gonna need you to step out of the car and place your thumbs on this text-alizer..."

Crash test dummy has sign in rear of test car that says "Dummy On Board"