Car Accident Aficionado Gifts

'Can you hang on for half an hour? We're still waiting for the reality TV crew to turn up'

The first car accident.

The hall of bad ideas.

'Okay - Let's crash that bad boy.'

"Sir, I'm afraid there's no easy way to say this..."

"The operation was a huge success, Mr. Smith, but we're going to have to open you up again - we appear to have lost a nurse."

'I wish McWit would lead a life of quiet desperation.'

Crash Test Dummy Jokes that Get Old Fast. Oh, no! Somebody cut the brakes! Every single time.

Test dummies in car, "Oh my god dave, look out for that wall!"

Fall Rocks/Deer Crossing

'Paramedic' 'Doctor' 'Clean underpants man'

'Business has doubled since we organized that women's beach volleyball tournament across the street.'

'Oh, no -- not again!'

"I'd like 40 kilos of pain killers, please."

"That's chemical law for you. No matter how minor the damage claim, our fee is always major."

Rental Car Return. By the way, the airbags worked great!

'We have a new tribe member everyone. We will call him'Crashes-His-Volvo.'

Pulling the Anchor Out

"On the plus side, you've cured my back pain."

'Went in for a simple blood test and got cloned by mistake.'

'Not only the first wheel, the first road accident as well!'

Man sweeps through newly painted 'entrance' door, knocking over sign painter on the other side.

'Oops sorry, but it is such a big target'

Bumper stickers in the Demolition Derby.

'Maybe you should let the wine you packed go to waste. That's the bag with our laundry.'

"Go away. I haven't had an accident that wasn't my fault in the last three years."

'No, something really slinky -- I wrecked the car!'

'Your luggage was accidentally sent to Singapore, sir, and you're being tried in absentia there for smuggling after-shave lotion.'

'You're Jack Tinsley, the lawyer? Great, I was just on the way to see you about an accident I had this morning.'

'You've been in many accidents so we'll have to rate you higher for an auto insurance policy.'

Blowing your nose musically.

"Only you could walk into a door at 'doors open'!"

"Guess who I bumped into in the car park. Your boss."

"It's okay. I've got pet insurance."

"Looks like we've broken into the stained glass market."