Canteen Chaos Gifts

'You made me jump,'

'Don't put knife in your mouth.' 'My forks leaks.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

Is that pancake ready yet?

Man's cooking explodes.

Cafe Burns.

Ten out of ten for effort...

Anti-inflammation recipes

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

'Who the heck told my wife I had rights to parental leave?'

'Chili again?'

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

Disaster in the kitchen.

'Do you want toast with that?'

'Careful, this used to be hot.'

'Your tea is getting cold.'

'I'm sorry we put bearnaise sauce on your fillet by mistake. Randy will have it off there in a jiffy.'

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

A short-order cook gets sucked into the exhaust vent over the grill.

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'

'Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday you like beans, now you don't like beans.'

'Continue gently simmering for ten minutes...'

"Glad you have time for lunch today, honey."

Chef looking up confused, Waiter behind him with pancake on his head.

"That is why you don't put 'instant rice' in a slow cooker."

"We'll get your food going as soon as the exterminators are done in the kitchen."

Rameses' Kitchen Nightmares

Schoolgirl in canteen: 'The food's great but I wish they'd stop calling it 'pukka tukka'.'

'We've finished the dishes, Miss. Jenny washes, I wiped, and Susan picked up all the pieces.'

"I just finished my on-line food safety course!"

"Ah-sod it! I think I'll get a takeaway instead..."

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Cook Book. The cookbooks are just Ernie's way of shifting the blame.

"I can't open the fridge door, there are too many fridge magnets on it!"

'I know you are doing your best, but it will be great when Pat comes home.'