Cannabis Researcher Gifts

"Any pain relief with the cannabis?"

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

'When I asked you to do research for your assignment, I meant the library not on Google!'

"I'll faithfully follow any diet plan as long as you also prescribe medical marijuana."

'It's nothing that a few stem cells and 75 years of research can't fix.'

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

Cannabis: Anti-seizure Medication

'Well, at least it has bubbles.'

The discoverer of fire meets the discoverer of marijuana

Peer-reviewed journal publication.

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

'Now here's my idea...we come up with a really high-priced drug to treat drug side effects...'

"I'm not going to shoot the messenger, but I'm also not going to renew his grant."

'NEW! Runs on alcohol' 'What a coincidence - so does he.'

A lab rat stares back at a scientist.

"He's been like that ever since he stopped eating the stuff and began smoking it."

"Nah, dude, I'm Tokey Bear. Smokey's on vacation. Hey you got any snacks?"

"You come highly recommended. I like that."

'I want you stop referring to our grant as 'The Big Dipper.''

Cannabis Dispensary: Walk-ins awkwardly trying to look nonchalant welcome!

'Dear, when I die, what ever you do, don't donate my body to science.'

Nobody warned Marge that a side effect of a hip replacement is feeling more hippy.

'Join us. There' a talk on medical marijuana and a pot-luck dinner afterward.'

Flo figured that since she was using medical marijuana during chemo, she might as well go hippy retro.

"We just made a big cancer breakthrough. Have a cigar."

Stoner Dog

"I've tried Buddhism, Taoism, Transendental meditation, Confucionism, Theolog, Scientgology....but I've found a good hand rolled joint of homegrown works best!"

"I keep up with all the journals."

"My joints... are almost done"

I'm not entirely sure I'm conscious, doc. It occurred to me last night, I am not an individual. I am a colony of 32 trillion individual living cells. Dr. Noodle

"Looks like we left out the wrong brownies."

Joe's Bar and Grill and Focus Group.

"As soon as our state legalizes fireworks, gay marriage, and marijuana - I'm going to start throwing awesome parties you're not invited to."

"I don't prescribe opioids, but feel free to grab a CBD-laced lollipop on your way out."

"Dude, we've struck cannabis oil! We're going to be rich!"