Canine Humor Gifts

A man walks past a storefront for the "American Kennel Club" that has a sign in its windows that reads: "Some dogs allowed".

"Do me next."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"It get it – you're hungry."

"Yes, it's oil-paint: It's difficult to find water for watercolours around here..."

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

Cat croissant, cat baguette, cat muffin, cat turnover

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"He's no hat and all corgis."

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

"Shake! Good Dog."

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

Snowmobull

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

Hey. Hey. Polly wants some folly.

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

'I'd like to return this, please.'

Dog wearing a cone

"Now there's something you don't see everyday. How long have you been using dachshunds as sled dogs.?"

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

'After years of practicing in empty theaters, Horace's dream of becoming a soft-shoe dancer seemed as remote as ever.'

Surprised chicken: 'I know. I can't believe it either.'

'Who had the ocean whitefish and tua paté?'

Of Mice and Men.

"Honk if you love me!"

After chasing the rabbit for many hours, Buster found himself very far from home indeed.

Dog on a Shelf.

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

Cat plays an arcade game that involves shooting at gun into a mouse hole.

"Ugh—someone in the group chat must have seen a squirrel."

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

"Pssst. Fake poop."

Browned off cows. They can't pull a cracker.

"Now turn your head and bark."