Dog-loving Humor Gifts

"I ran out of masks and the dog didn't need this anymore, so. . ."

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

"Shake! Good Dog."

Dog wearing a cone

Dog on a Shelf.

After chasing the rabbit for many hours, Buster found himself very far from home indeed.

'Don't worry, my baser instincts are in a surgical waste bin in Hoboken.'

'You're the watchdog. Do you honestly expect us to believe you didn't see anything?'

'Everybody from Liverpool's a comedian.'

Balloon dog training

"Oo, I get to write a memo! I'm excited! I'm excited!"

-'Okay Rebel, find the drugs.' -'Are you kidding? There's dirty underwear here!'

Dog Training.

"When I get to heaven do you think I'll get my testicles back?"

Cuthbert was a pit of a party animal

"The party was a total surprise! Everybody jumped out and screamed 'Happy Birthday' just as I was licking my balls!"

'The pats on the head are nice, but I need more compensation...'

'Forget about marriage conselling: Me, I sent Max to Obedience School instead...'

"Get a life."

Woman Walking a Trojan Horse

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

"So the old man says 'you're getting fixed,' and I'm thinkin', you know, maybe he's gonna patch up the hole in my doghouse..."

"You hit the ball- that's ping. Your opponent hits the ball- that's pong!"

'That's the problem with Dacshunds, you can never tell whether they're coming or going.'

'Oh goody, chunky soup!'

"You say: It's nothing more than jealousy inspired backstabbing. I say: It's the fourth report of butt-sniffing I've had this week."

Dog sees venus fly trap catch a fly and copies it...

"Go on. Throw the stick."

'You sound like a bunch of cats! The growl has to be deeper and the barks crisper. Okay, let's take it again from the first howl.'

'Tell me this isn't celery.'

"Trust me, catching it isn't that satisfying."