Canine Cognoscente Gifts

"Is that one of those brandy dogs?"

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

"And, when the DNA test results arrived, the woman realized her so-called 'little terrier mix' had been part German shepherd all along."

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

Canine obidience class: 'He wouldn't budge from the armchair.'

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

'Or we could just ask her what kind of dog it is.'

'Another blond hair! You've been making a lot of night calls lately...'

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Two men toting a dog in a carriage by foot, while the dog sticks his head out the window.

Dog phrenology

'Try the steak tartare...it's okay.'

'Sorry Ben, I never noticed the baby-sitting clause in the stud contract.'

"You are going to have lots of puppies."

Dog Park Zoom

"If man is my best friend, why is he giving me this crap to eat?"

"What's all this?"

'Are you SURE you switched off the electric blanket, luv?'

'Have you tried out new Labrador Retriever Butt Scent?'

A skinny dog drawn with zen brush.

'I can see the practical side of fetching, but what's the point of rolling over?'

"Watch his feet - if he doesn't step into the throw, he's going to fake it."

Jumping Dogs

Being able to digest news quickly is a sure sign of intelligence.

Dog Sees Only Food

"I think what he's trying to tell you, dear, is that he doesn't quite care for the cheaper dog food!"

'Harvey, I'm afraid the dog has the mailman intimidated.'

"You've got to lay off the homework."

"What's worse, that or this?"

Dogs and Cake

"I now propose a 5 minute break so we can confide with our dogs."

"And everything from my dig is brought here where it's identified, classified, interpreted, and the eaten."

Dog executives are in a duel

'He's a very superior dog. Even his fleas have pedigrees!'