Canine Connoisseur Gifts

Dogs as bookends.

Dachshund grown chart

"He's a bird-dog."

'I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid that's inappropriate.'

Stare your way to bigger meals

"I'll take squirrel behavior for $500."

'This is is a Merlot...I didstinctly asked for a Cabernet Sauvignon! '

Two men toting a dog in a carriage by foot, while the dog sticks his head out the window.

Four Star Meal

"Whenever you're ready."

'He's half Pit bull and half Collie. He'll tear an arm off and go for help.'

Dog Bar - Yappy Hour.

'He must be pleased with me. He's wagging his finger.'

"Dangerous? Nah, I could count on one hand the number of times he's bitten me."

'He didn't come running when I used the electric can opener!'

He's at that confusing stage between chasing his own tail or the mail carrier's.

Park Ruling - Please clear up after your dog.

"The special, sir. Shall I spread it out or will you knock it over yourself?"

'This is 'Louis': He can make a fake pedigree for 200 dollars...'

'You realize you're spoiling Bilbo.'

"He said he was a dog person so I dated him, but he was secretly a cat person."

'I keep them around because they have skills I need.'

'I'd like a second opinion. Something about this guy just doesn't smell right.'

"Rollo used to be a police dog!"

Colin had standards, and not eating 'own brand' food was one of them.....

'Excuse me, EXCUSE ME, what's that YOU'RE eating?!'

'You can sniff out pet supplies on aisle five.'

Last painting of a dog for 200 yd

Basset Hound.

First Class Pooch

'Don't worry - he's only tasting it.'

'He has been asked to review a new dog treat ... '

A skinny dog drawn with zen brush.

'Have you tried out new Labrador Retriever Butt Scent?'

'Chasing mailmen is for proles. The likes of us prefer to chase tax collectors.'