Canine Beautician Gifts

"The groomer used too much product."

Braiding a Horse's Tail

"Well, if she didn't insist on giving me this stupid look, she wouldn't need to buy me coats in winter..."

'The word bath is mentioned.'

Why would a dog wear a hat?

Dog wearing jumper to hide his spots.

"C'mon already...that lipstick really isn't my shade."

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

"I'm so looking forward to the weekend, there's a show on: We're going to be pampered and they'll put lovely ribbons in our manes..."

Woman Curls Her Dog.

"Come on, let me cut your fringe! You look ridiculous!"

'Oh Mike, what have they done to you?'

'Just the usual, thanks.'

'You say he's been shaking his head?'

'At least when they shear you, they finish the job... Look at me! I look ridiculous...'

"Oh, Bruno! Just look at the subtle hues in those tulips!"

Dogs wearing sweaters

Dog decides what hat to wear.

"In my day, dogs slept outside in a doghouse." "But... this is nice."

We have dog spas, dog motels, dog walkers, dog designer clothes...

I'd rather be cold.

"Have you been giving the dog a make over again?"

"But daddy, Princess doesn't BURY bones! She expects you to wrap them carefully and gently place them in the freezer to stay fresh!"

I love what you've done with your hare.

'Okay Floyd. You know what to do. And make it ridiculous.'

'This is the place I was telling you about.'

Hair of the dog spots: a whippet

"No offense, but you look better in Photoshop."

"Will these hooves ever dry?"

"We'll have the people food."

'Pardon me for saying, but you look like a husky to me.'

"Sure Sir, hair extensions could indeed make you more impressive when you're bristling..."

'Raise your paw for the corresponding ear when you hear the sound of a can opener.'