Candy Consultant T-Shirts

'Gracie's the only kid I know who analyses her halloween sweets before eating them.'

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

An historic event in Candyland: When M met M

'Take two tootsie rolls and call me in the morning.'

'The doctor's gonna have to wire your mouth shut for a month... but guess what! If you're brave, I'll give you this lollipop when he's done!'

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

"Uh-oh. My inner GPS is recalculating."

Bubble gum leaves

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

"Halloween is the perfect time to land on Earth. Nobody will notice us and we can get free candy."

"Sis, my teacher said to list the four food groups. . . but I can only think of three. Cookies, candy and ice cream!"

Chocolate Shop

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

"Dessert?""No thanks, I'm stuffed."

'You've got to help me, Doc! I've got a crush on St. Valentine all Year!!'

"The best thing about this, is the lovely honeycomb centre."

"Since you're going to the dentist, I bought you a giant lollipop to go out in style."

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

The Corner Of Ogden And Nash: Candy is Daddy/Liquor is Quicker

"It's hard being a grownup, too – did you know we have absolutely zero limits on treats?"

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

'Does this perfume have an antidote?'

All-Candy Seder.

'What kind of filling would you like?'

'I told that boy no snacks before dinner, , ,'

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

'Kudos to Bill for the cotton candy machine idea!'

The dark side of Halloween.

"If you dress in a costume that they can't figure out, they feel guilty and give you more candy."