Campus Ponderer Gifts

'Into each life, a certain amount of analytical incongruity must fall.'

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Space is curved and time is relative? Yeah, OK...I'm calling you a cab right now, buddy."

"Academic freedom doesn't mean you're free not to study."

'I like the history professor but I think he's mired in the past.'

"What if Newton came up with a different idea from a fallen apple."

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

"Quantum Physics"? How am I going to learn all of this stuff? A bit at a time?

"Still, he might be remembered as the 'no cloning' President."

Master's Degrees of the Universe

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

"Today we'll examine that age old question of robot accomplishment: programming or processor?"

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

Time, Temp, Today's Neutrino Mass

"What if it's smarter than us?"

Are you aware? The Higgs Boson was thought to exist even through no one had seen it!

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!!"

"If you have to ask, you can't afford it."

"I wish I'd failed my 11 Plus too...."

'Turn your thinking cap around, Robert.'

Personnel. I figure since every boss tells you to forget everything you learned in school, not learning anything to begin with puts me ahead of the pack.

'Tsk...woolly thinking again.'

Diversity Does Not Include Class

'It's not working because it claims it can think and has decided not to.'

"Genetic engineering has made us disease resistant."

Robot Attack in Bath

"Well I think the Real question is..."

'Revolution? I thought you creatures said you wanted Evolution!'

"An equation for your thoughts?"

The mysterious world of ligand substitution

Dr. McPhee discovers the Embarrassment Particle.

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

Six months later they would be sharing the Nobel Prize, but for now all they could do was stare in amazement at what they had discovered...two incredibly well preserved specimens from the styrofoam age.'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

"I knew it was unnatural to jump that high out of water."