Campus Life Aficionado Gifts

College. Did you pick a major yet? I'm doing a double major in art and logic --- I want to draw my own conclusions!

'You must have been wearing your beer googles.'

All Hail the Matriarchy

"Political Science... that's in the Department of Performing Arts."

Santa does a keg stand.

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'

Our college is tuned to the students' every need! Campus Visits. We have body image awareness week. Safe sex awareness week. Bullying, drug use and tolerance awareness weeks. What did I miss? Welcome. History, math or English awareness week? Great idea. I'll suggest that.

"And in the category of 'The Most Amazing Comeback from an Academic Nosedive,' the winner is..."

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

Yale makes better lock than rival Harvard.

Big Fish Little Fish Cardboard Box.

Teacher and students.

"Well, my IQ is 180--and that's in Centigrade, not Fahrenheit."

Well, wish me luck. Mom and dad can handle an 'A' and two 'B's, but I've REAL-L-L-L-Y got to spin the 'D' in math!

"Quit your whining... Someday you'll appreciate affordable student housing."

"I need a gap year."

The farm-raised catfish goes to college

"Term paper?! How do we do that? We haven't done a term paper all year!"

'It was your typical student flat: dirty dishes, broken furniture, grubby carpet and cracks in the walls'

Taser incident.

"I guess we love Uni because we get to narrow our minds with like-minded people."

"These days, professor it's "T.V. punditry or perish.""

Did I cheat? You're not wearing a wire, are you?

Cutting Room Floor

Philosophy Department: You are Here...But why?

Trouble at med school - "Gosh, it's already my third day and I'm still sober."

The life of a professor is great- it's either publish or PARIS!'

The Medical Student

"So how's that math grade looking? What's the team GPA this year?"

"We just want you to know that wherever you wind up going to college is fine with us, as long as it's someplace we can brag about to our friends."

Campus police are dorm troopers.

'I admit I copied all my essays from the internet.'

'Interesting specialist subjects.'

"That's the famous Josh—a high-impact body harboring a very low-impact mind."