Campfire Cooks Gifts

Bones barbecue.

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

Take seat. Nothing makes me happier than keeping people warm and cooking s'mores for them. Friendly fire.

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

Sausages.

Desert Island BBQ

Harsh Mellows.

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

"Lori, out here it's my kitchen!"

'Any wilderness skills besides making smores?'

Holiday Supplies

Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank

A marshmallow? Oh, no, thank you, I'm good.

Pan Extension Chord

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

Roasting the Moneybox

"Can we set the flame to a medium high?"

"I said, 'Fetch Chardonnay,' not 'Riesling.'"

'Marshmallows ready! Now for the roasting...'

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

"Yes, we're stranded here... but think how healthier we are eating nothing but fish!"

Professor Algarth Zag, pioneer in fire research.

"Just lemme finish my coffee."

"I'm not a total vegetarian, sometimes I like a bit of buffalo."

"Let’s not speak of this, Tommy – scouts’ honor?"

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

Flash Cuisine

"This one's really scary. It's about what's happening to my 401k."

Cannibal recipes.

Nobody likes a smore loser

"and when they woke up, the kids discovered that the house had just one 19", black & white TV that only got... 3 channels."

"You were right, Louis. . . I was cold before, but now it's warm and toasty."