Campaign Craftsman Gifts

Copywriter for Deodorant Commercials

"It's a heck of a tale...and well told, but we don't publish resumes."

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

"He was a big man, but he moved like a cat."

GOP exaggerating scale of immigration, inflation and crime rates

Bad Interview Technique

'I would love to run for class president, but I'm concerned about the vetting process. I once faked sleep during nap time in pre-school.'

'Are you sure you brought the right flat pack?'

'Daddy! There's a Politician in my closet!'

Tony Blair

"Hold still, it's a programme about making your own tv cabinet."

Now You're Talking

'Remember when the worry was over little swift boat attacks?'

Stage producer.

Save our seals - "I doubt my little vote will make any difference."

"Maybe I can be a campaign worker."

'Yep, I've voted in every election since 1948!' 'Don't be so hard on yourself!'

'I know the marketing budget is stretched...but I still think we need professional models!'

Creative Director skipping through an advertising portfolio.

"If reelected, this time, I promise not to procrastinate for four years and then try to get all my governing done in one epic all-nighter."

"Your resume says SOB, tell me more about that."

Trump holds 'Vote for Me!' sign at the bottom of the Statue of Liberty.

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

"The last thing that I intend to do is to stand here making a display of my patriotism."

Stephen Harper on the attack ads.

'The press is calling you overconfident. Stop using ‘Hail To The Chief' as your ringtone.'

"We all know the Senator's position regarding term limits."

Giant 'NO' with a small man holding a 'Yes',

'Not only have I never been a Congressman, but I've never even set foot in Washington!'

You wanted to see me, boss? Rudy, did you realize it's illegal for a boss to tell his minion how to vote? Wink wink wink.

"I spent twelve years making this. Where's MY award?"

Vote

"None of the candidates - not one - talks about health insurance for use."

"What factors influenced your decision to use this particular exit?"