Camerawoman Gifts

Corrupt and Unresponsive

'It's my new hobby. Do something interesting. This is streaming live on the internet.'

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

If nobody had invented graphics

Working in the Hazard Zone!

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

Cut!

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

Movie Awards. Winner. It's been a big night for Ernie! He won three times at the movie-set caterer awards! On one set he made a healthy, refreshing beverage that received rave reviews from the cast and crew. He won the "best pitcher" award for it. Did they say he won for best costumes? No, his dressings won. His sticky buns won also. For "best leading roll" performance, right? No, for best "cinnamontography"!

"Here's the deal, boys. We need to see a little more bickering. We're doing a Reality Show."

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

Local News in Heaven

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

Police film evidence

Next camera crew 5 mins

"Your motivation is that you're a dog and it's food."

"... And in Canada today ... nothing happened."

As you can see, media coverage at this event is very heavy...

“Look! We’re on the naked cam!”

Hollywood producer.

So, Leo catches me, devours me...wears make up?"

Man Ray

"Ugh! Stop making a drama documentary out of a molehill."

True Story Movie

"In this scene, imagine you're sentient and know what feelings are."

'We're really just a mom and pop store...if mom and pop had 600,000 employees.'

A series of cameras go through a war zone.

The hazards of trying to film a horse jump.

"Actually, I work for a newspaper, but people won't talk to me without it."

A fly on the wall documentary.

"O.K. 'The Giant Baby from Space,' Take 1."

Two reporters interview each other.

"It's my extreme sports camera. I thought it would be cool to show my mom what I do at work."

A convict escaping during the press scrum

"They say she's gone completely Sundance."