Camden Market Regular Gifts

Steampunk

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

"Rump roast?"

'I never should have ordered the diet platter.'

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

"Can you come back? We're still counting carbs."

"Ladies first. Actually, it's safety first. But ladies are definitely a close second."

I'd like to take this menu and shove it where the sun don't shine. But I'll settle for the omelette & hash browns...

"Waiter, there's a weapon of mass destruction in my soup!"

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"Yep, I've read this chapter before."

I wish I'd had the review.

"Are these prices?" "No, that's our Calorie-fixe menu."

'Men order. . . women shop.'

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

'The beef has been genetically modified to make it taste like a more expensive cut.'

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

"And would you like flies with that?"

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

Don't go out in the rain without an umbrella....was probably not 'his idea' of a tip, dear!'

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

'Hi, I'm Bob and I'll be your waiter ... and this is my wife, Susan, and her two children from a former marriage, Jimmy and Cindy.'

Prawn Cocktail Please

'This fortune cookie says 'buy oriental tea futures'...'

"This controls the speed, this opens the door and if you press the red button a maintenance man appears and gives you a very large bill"

'George, you're supposed to be tasting the wine, not seeing what effect it has.'

'Two famous French wines.' 'Red and white.'

"What!?! I like a nice salad every now and then, too. What of it?"