Calm Confidante Gifts

"Don't worry, darling. You'll happen."

"If it were painful, could I do this?"

"Oh good, more time alone for quiet reflection."

"Geez, from way up here it almost looks like there’s hope for humanity."

Time for tea and friendship.

Need an elevated state of mind too!

'I can remember when no one had even heard of t'ai chi.'

Introducing Ambient Books: No beginning...no middle...no end...just a bunch of sentences specially written to soothe and relax the reader.

"Remember, Mort: Courage isn't the absence of fear. Courage is remaining media-savvy in the face of fear!"

'Don't worry, son. This bed inking incident will be our little secret.'

'You wouldn't believe the day I've had.'

"I now propose a 5 minute break so we can confide with our dogs."

"I feel like my emotional baggage is permanently stuck on the luggage carousel."

'Calm down darling... now what do you mean the tortoise has gone berserk?'

With his mothers persuasion, Joe decided to 'come clean' to the police!

"It's my box of secrets. It has things I've thought about but would never tell anyone!"

Wearing bras in 2020.

Ned's Northingness: All the Nothing You Need To Achieve Mindfulness

"See what I mean? People don't know how to relax anymore."

Cat steals food from owner who is distracted by feeding the dog.

"Fetch, Millennia. ... Or don’t fetch. Either way, you’re perfect!"

'The therapy is working... I don't use all caps in emails anymore.'

Chameleon. Calmer Chameleon. Calmer Calmer Calmer Calmer Calmer Chameleon.

"No matter how dire the problem...no more memos that start with 'YIKES!'"

"My philosophy has always been 'Don't sweat the small stuff -- it's all small stuff!'"

"Darn it, she's unreachable when she gets her inbox down to zero."

"This is sheer bloody mindfulness."

Tai Chi

"Baldo, you deserve this raise. But please don't tell anybody what I'm paying you."

"I think I just chased the wrong squirrel."

Promise you won't tell anyone that I like Ryan Beardsley? Of course. I'd die if anyone knew! Ryan B?!! LOL!!! Ha! R.B.? Not likely! Em! You promised not to say anything. I didn't I just texted! I just died!!

This is a library - no sonic booms, please.

"It's father, doctor, he's creaking badly."

'Papi, kids at school are saying Nora and I are illegal...'

Dog waiting in a car for his owner to return from the pharmacy