Calm Amidst The Storm T-Shirts

"I gotta go. I see an opening in the maelstrom."

Bite out of fishing pier.

'Yes, as a matter of fact, you have caught me at a bad time.'

"Geez, from way up here it almost looks like there’s hope for humanity."

"Oh good, more time alone for quiet reflection."

"I know — but he was nervous and his support dog didn’t seem to mind."

Need an elevated state of mind too!

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

Introducing Ambient Books: No beginning...no middle...no end...just a bunch of sentences specially written to soothe and relax the reader.

'I can remember when no one had even heard of t'ai chi.'

When mediation failed, they tried meditation.

"It's days like this that make me glad I became a teacher."

"You can tell us the sound of one hand clapping here, or you can tell us downtown."

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

The only creation God was truly proud of was the Sabbath

'Calm down darling... now what do you mean the tortoise has gone berserk?'

'I feel wired. I want to feel wireless.'

I love thunderstorms!

Sea of Tranquillity

'Shhhhh...He's preparing for the holiday season.'

'Only one side effect - colossal pain...'

'I think you got the drummer - Now try for the trumpet player!'

"It's lonely at the top, but don't you love the solitude."

"I moved out here for peace and quiet, but now I keep talking to myself."

"What are you yelling at me for? You're the one at the tiller."

'I wish I could be as calm as JB when it comes to making decisions.'

'That's where he goes to regain his sanity.'

Chameleon. Calmer Chameleon. Calmer Calmer Calmer Calmer Calmer Chameleon.

"This is sheer bloody mindfulness."

Don't sweat the small stuff

"My philosophy has always been 'Don't sweat the small stuff -- it's all small stuff!'"

'All I said was - chill out don't flap!'

"Your blood pressure is completely normal. Are you sure you're married with children?"