Calculation Whiz Gifts

'If your calculations are correct, this completely revolutionizes everything we thought we knew about why chalk squeaks on a blackboard!'

ACcountants Lunch

You called me? Why're you in your lab coat? Big discovery. Since 1768, the Giacomo Theorem has stated the number of chicks a dude can pick up is inversely proportional to his age. But he was wrong. You mean … He forgot to carry the charm.

Theoretical mathematician proving why he's had all he can take.

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

'C'mon get it straight.'

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

Albert Einstein

'Does this have anything to do with Einstein's theory of relativity?'

"What's a debenture?"

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

Girl does mathematical equation. Man says 'Tut! Teenagers today and their problems ...'

'Remember, Edward, inside every 'F' student is a 'D' student trying to get out.'

Einstein's T-Shirt reads: My Wife Doesn't Understand Me.

'I started out as a teacher's pet, and then it kind of snowballed.'

'I'll give you a clue. The answer is a number, not a fruit.'

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

'It was bound to happen - they're beginning to think like binary computers.'

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

"How was work?"

'Recalculating...recalculating...'

Archimedes helps Sisyphus

Calculation Board - You Are Here

'Add the numbers, divide by how many numbers you've added and there you have it-the average amount of minutes you sleep in class each day.'

'This is embarrassing. By MY calculations, the universe should have collapsed in on itself last Wednesday.'

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'

"May I get an equation in edgewise."

'And what part of the formula don't you understand?'

When Dinosaurs ruled the Earth.

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

'Simply put.'

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

"It's called geometry, Mum."

"Excuse me, Professor. I think I might have spotted a flaw in your theory!"