Cable Crusaders Gifts

"Dear, you can't blame everything on the high price of cable..."

Overworked in the office

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

'Now I know why the strategy guide warned against entering the 5th stage. Awesome!'

"Brandon isn't adapting well to the open office concept."

"Must get a longer cable."

"They're being very good. They're playing superheroes!"

Do not think outside the box!

Whack, Out of Whack.

The Corporate Rat.

'Chin up, Simpson, it's for the good of the firm.'

'Walter, stop fantasizing and get back to your desk.'

'I'm not here looking for a job. I'm the temp who's replacing you when the boss fires you today.'

'Only another thirty-four years, five months and fourteen days until I retire.'

Haven't Rented a Game in 2 Weeks.

A crab finds an alternative to walking sideways.

'Too long at his desk...we're going need surgery to cut him free.'

"Now that you mention it, I have to admit, the daily grind IS starting to get to me!"

'We had to get him a seeing-eye dog.'

"Your mom's not protesting sex and violence on TV...she's taking a stand against those early Christmas ads..."

"I miss the old cubicles."

'They aren't shy about cutting you out of the decision making process.'

'This is a very bad report, Jenkins. Go to your cubicle.'

In the Fever Cubicle

'I do the work of three men...how about giving one of us a decent salary?'

"We give thanks for superfast broadband, 4G connectivity ..."

Game Addiction

'Oh come on, we all have our crosses to bear.'

'Nothing says Christmas like a game of 'Death Slayer 4'.'

'No, Stanworth, feeling sick of your job does not qualify you for sick leave.'

Still Here

"The buck stops next door"

'I want someone who'll not just take the firms line, but the hook and sinker, too.'

'Oh it's YOU, Mike! For a moment, I thought I heard the tormented howl of a caged animal!'