Business Metaphor Maven Gifts

"Forget about it Al. Looks like a case of too big to fail."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

Apples for sale

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

Ghostwriting the Bible

"#Win!"

Creative department

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

'Don't worry about it. If at first we don't succeed, we can do it later and get paid time-and-a-half for it.'

"Does anyone here have a clue what it is we used to get?"

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

'Kroft, Kroft, Kroft...to thine own demographic be true!'

"Ever since you changed from a frog to a Prince you seem a little jumpy!"

Direct Marketing...

Adam names the animals (He puts sticky notes on them saying Shaz, Dave, Trish etc).

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

'What did I tell you? There's always a catch to those bargain internet travel fares...'

"May I skip the usual Show & Tell and try to hustle some merch?"

Wolf to Red Riding Hood: 'No thanks, I'm on a strict grandmother diet.'

"I don't have to be a team player, Crawford. I'm the team owner."

Corporate Team Building. Team. Hey, everybody, I've just been told our CEO fled the country while we've been doing our truth exercises.

Stonehenge Explained

Invisible clothes

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

Trade Show Sherpas

'Okay, okay, be patient!'

'Once, long ago, I thought I was wrong...but it turned out I was mistaken.'

The bad news is our boxer shorts are still bursting into flames. The good news is our brand recognition is through the roof

'I think it's time to rein in Henderson.'

"Just go with the workflow."

'It's perfect, but can we see it in white?'