Busiest Turkey Gifts

"The boss is really pushing me to finish up before Thanksgiving."

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

'I hear there is a mighty big turkey in these woods.'

"Call me selfish if you want, but I have no issue with spoiling the farmer's Christmas lunch: I'm out of here..."

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

"I guess it must be that new growth hormone the farmer gave me!"

"Never say you're stuffed!"

'When they start calling you a splendid bird, you know you're in trouble.'

Roscoe's Great Escape

"For keyhole turkey carving we use a 12 mm port in each flank and third in the midline."

'Haven't you ever heard of warmed up turkey?'

A Dog Is For Life Not Just For Christmas.

"He bought a thermometer for me, and I'm not even sick."

'I'm sleepy all the time.'

Christmas was the one time of year when Roger could take advantage of working in the genetic research laboratory.

"Don't fall for it! He's just trying to fatten you up for Thanksgiving!"

'I don't know what happened in there, Stanley... But I've completely lost the urge to eat. I mean it - I feel stuffed! Supposed to come back right before thanksgiving for a follow-up though.'

Ineffective Turkey Disguises

"Bad news - your DNA was delicious."

"Those giblets are gonna have to come out."

'Want to come to the Thanksgiving play, Grandma? I have a real meaty part.'

"Since no family can come this year, I thought I'd invite you to dinner instead."

Turkey Owl

'Hank, I know you're new at turkey hunting, but that isn't the way you call turkeys.'

'Boy, that is one old Turkey.'

"Not a good sign. It's a box of pop-up thermometers."