Bureaucracy Survivalist Gifts

'Its reading Health and Safety Regulations that make me feel sick!'

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

Late/Too Late.

"You knew this was a soul-sucking job when you took it."

The Buck Never Stops.

"And once you've achieved your 25% improvement in client satisfaction surveys, we need you to solve the problem of global warming,third world poverty and cold toast."

'Ever feel like you've walked into a corporate lion's den?'

Cafe Burns.

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

Bureaucracy gone mad!

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

Anti stress week: For God sake don't miss it!!

'I hear they're letting you go. Your family must have paid the ransom.'

With the office space available, we have no choice but to believe in teamwork!

"It drives me MAD when people act as though we've nothing to do except write moronic memorandum."

"Thankfully, this year, the results can be attributed to something other than our own gross incompetence."

Prepper Dog

"Why can't we just have a normal home security system like the neighbours."

"The quicksand was corporate's idea. I wanted to fire you for going over my head. They wanted to send a message."

Doctor surrounded by notes.

'Well, that's simplified the mission statement.'

'It's a government funded study to find out how many wrongs make a right.'

'Oh, we tried a nurturing corporate culture, but we found the law-of-the-jungle mentality is what keeps our competitive edge..'

'It's not so much the distance to your proposed mini-mall site, but that I'm not as familiar with your galaxy's zoning laws as I'd like to be.'

"What's this? Now we have to hunt, gather and collate?"

"Hi, I'm Cindy, the company's most toxic employee!"

GPs could be forced to switch IT systems onto new NHS digital contract

Tsunami Evac Route

IN, OUT, NOT WORTH THE EFFORT.

'This doesn't look good.'

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

"The water for your fishbowl was approved, but it looks like for now you're not getting the fish."

"This is to apologise for the delay in internal mail that you wrote to us about in 1997"

"Here's a little song I wrote in prison. Actually, I was at Motor Vehicle renewing my license, but it SEEMED like prison."