Building Society Worker Gifts

'You know I'm beginning to think that bank that bought us out were asset strippers.'

"Living in a city with functional infrastructure must be so boring."

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'Why couldn't you just give him a bucket and shovel?'

Pipe Dream.

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"As I understand it, after this scaffolding comes down the city will be done."

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

'I found the termites!'

This will be an environmentally sound house built entirely from trees that fell over naturally from old age.

A man sees a leak in his ceiling and drills a hole in the floor under leak to by pass his apartment.

Another All Steel Home Built By Wit Construction.

'You've reached McWit Quality Construction. If your foundation has cracked, press 1, if your plumbing is leaking press 2, if your house is collapsing, press 3 ...'

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

"Jimmy, I want you to meet our new safety officer."

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

Crane operator Jimmy Morrison liked to break in new guys by giving them what he called a 'sky wedgie.'

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

'You say the ARKS are NOT two by two?'

'Say baby - 'come live with me and be my love, and we will all the pleasures prove, that valleys, groves, hills and fields,woods or steepy mountain yields' - Marlowe.'

There is nothing more satisfying that peeling the film off a brand new building.

"Wait, there's another fold? No wonder we have so many extra stones."

Cleric with bible briefcase.

IRMA Hurricane Recovery in Cuba

'Where do I put the batteries?'

"We need a union!'

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

"We could have been here sooner, but we wanted to wait until the beautiful Yellow Brick Road was built."

Welcome Association of Stage Builders.

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'