Housing Association Worker Gifts

Housing association charities resist government right-to-buy proposals.

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

"She'll have a Shirley Temple, and I'll have a Shirley Temple's mother."

Courtyard of the Hotel de France, Montreuil.

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

"You've ordered comfort food. May I recommend a comfort wine?"

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

"What's happened to Quiche?"

Prawn Cocktail Please

"Are you sure you want to see the kitchen? The chef is naked."

'Waiter, could I have some more water right away?'

"The candy on the pillow is a nicety of the house."

"This is a little awkward, but you've been our guest for a while now, and we all have work in the morning..."

The Suite Hereafter

Would madam like me to send over the sympathy steward?

Seafood: "Of course our food is fresh."

"I only recommend the 24 oz. Prime rib for big fat guys."

Mini Bar

"I'm Todd, your waiter, and I'd like you to think our friendship is more than contextual."

Waiter' You betta stop that food fight, you SILLY fools! Here comes the Maitre D' !'

Burbank Imposes Parking Fee on RVs

"I like my steak well done."

No early morning tea past this landing

"Well, he's a celebrity chef and the celebreties love his cooking."

"You're close, but you're not the record. The record for one family in one booth—all from out of state, each ordering a complete breakfast—was set in 1978, with fifteen."

"And what do you think of the government's record on housing?"

'What do you recommend?.' 'A big tip.'

"Are we ‘still working’? No, we’re still eating. You, however, are ‘still working’—now get lost!"

'I'll have your head on a platter.'

"Didn't I say you'd be the only man not wearing a bow tie?"

"Privare equity bought the dam and jacked up rent. Nests are next."

'Hello room service - can you come and tuck me in and read me a story please'

'Hello Sir. I'm Jeff, and I'll be kissing your butt all evening in the hope of getting a decent tip.'

Homeless count.