Bug Repellent Jester Gifts

'I'm sick of you telling me what to do!'

"We're following Carrot Top."

"I know other hospitals are worried about the superbug, but ours is the only one that understands the accounts system."

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Malaprop Man, I hear you're fighting climate change now. Yes starting with solo panels, I'm reducing greenhouse guesses! I'm investing in buttery technology. I'm going to have windmeals. And of course, I've stopped drinking cola. Why is that? I'll have a smaller carbonated footprint!

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

Women in a cross country race

A woman takes a pterodactyl on a run.

Stepping on clown's shoe...

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

Jesus plays peek-a-boo with doubting Thomas.

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

Travelling jesters. No fools left aboard overnight.

'I'm looking for someone who can make me laugh.'

'Make sport of the Queen.'

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

'Ringing in your ears, you say?'

Show Jumping Tantrums

"And would you like a wine stopper?"

'I told the jester he could take April Fool's Day off.'

Never poke fun.

'I hate these commerical breaks!'

'From left to right: witchfinder general, jester jocular and spouse peculiar.'

"Work's been really hard."

"It's from Henry VIII, sire. He's going to be in town and wants to know where the best hook-up spots are."

"Must be the life to work in a castle. You get paid by a rich king and you don’t have to go through every shift smelling elephant butt."

'I bet he can run twice as fast as you can.' 'But he has twice as many legs!'

'Do something else - I don't like irony.'

I'll catch up to you --- I just need my second wind.

King and clown engage in role reversal.

"Is something funny, soldier?"

'Sit down, Roger! You're creating drag.'

"I paid three grand for this dress- I'll wear it wherever I want!"

Just for laughs, let's throw a few folks off course.