Budget Savvy Folks Gifts

This one's got power brakes, power steering, power windows and power payments!

"These are the principal qualities we're looking for in our new recruits."

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

'Bearing in mind I'm a man of few words - how much?'

Overdraft limit.

'What if we televise government budget hearings and make them pay-per-view?'

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

'You're clearly not well, just keep taking these until we run out of them.'

'Before we unload him, he'd like a written price support.'

Security/Savings

Husband dismayed to get cold mutton for dinner again. Wife comments that someone must be economical on the housekeeping money she is given.

"This is a third-year medical student. To cut costs, your insurance company dismissed the surgeon."

"... And how are you enjoying the cheapest bottle of wine on the menu?"

"For someone your age, the yearly premium on a $5,000 policy is $8,000."

Take one Per Day as Affordable.

"Wow, they want $10,000!"

'If the 750ml and th 375ml of the '82 Beaumont are too pricey, how about their Merlot-scented auto air freshener? -- Only 99 cents.'

Family Budgets

"Sergio, we don't have to spend so much money on health insurance."

Sam's Nation Building

A Room (with adequate light and ventilation, no psychotic neighbors, near a grocery store, in a halfway-decent building in an O.K. neighborhood [not Queens, please God] for under $2000 a month) of One's Own

Economic Experts

'Computer Prices' blowing away you money

Senior Brand Name Medicine Cabinet

'I'd like to stay and watch. It usually cuts the bill by 30%.'

"Our goal is to make prices so low that even our employees could shop here."

"Natasha cuts diagnosis costs."

'This is what telemedicine looks like for a small practice like ours.'

Good vision? Save Money - Tiny Type Books.

'The armed forces are having to respond to new kinds of threat.'

"We have our round cuts and these are our budget cuts."

"Get used to it...I think we're going to be eating them for a while yet..."

'I don't care if this security software was a bargain; it shouldn't reply with 'close enough' when I enter the wrong password.'

'From living beyond our means, we've gone to living beyond our wildest expectations!'