Budget Flying Pillows

"Thank goodness they added more leg room."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Unable to raise enough money for a trip to Paris, the Bartlesville High French Club had to settle for three days in Tulsa.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

"I just..."

'Budget cuts have forced us to drop our day-care program. I've contacted your mother to come and pick you up.'

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Fries and kids

'He must be going economy!'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

'They're alright if you like Charlie Chaplin inflight movies.'

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

World's cheapest car

"All I have left to cut is my lunch money."

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

'Not only can I not find the middle class tax cut, I can't find the middle class.'

Expensive greeting cards.

"I've run every test known to man, and it turns out you're allergic to medical bills."

"This is the last time I let you handle our vacation plans, you cheapskate."

Airline Mergers.

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

"They become aggressive when you recline them."

Due to recent cutbacks, several major airlines have eliminated their snack carts.

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

Excess Baggage: Many hotels, inspired by the airlines are gouging their guests by adding 'resort fees' to the room rates.