Budget Traveling Pillows

"I see you didn't purchase ANY leg room"

"Would you like the £40 room or the £60 room?"

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Unable to raise enough money for a trip to Paris, the Bartlesville High French Club had to settle for three days in Tulsa.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

'He must be going economy!'

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

'They're alright if you like Charlie Chaplin inflight movies.'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

"This is the last time I let you handle our vacation plans, you cheapskate."

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

World's cheapest car

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

Expensive greeting cards.

Airline Mergers.

Due to recent cutbacks, several major airlines have eliminated their snack carts.

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

Ticket machine costing an arm and a leg.

"For an extra charge, your flight can come with angst and insecurity."

"Free safety demonstration on board the flight?"

Basic economy

'We don't keep cash on the premises.'

Excess Baggage: Many hotels, inspired by the airlines are gouging their guests by adding 'resort fees' to the room rates.

Andy's first airplane experience was marred by his grandmother's stinginess

Europe on $5000 a day.