Budget Travelers Pillows

Phil would try anything to avoid paying hefty airport parking fees.

"Now boarding all passengers seated in Discomfort Class."

'The reason our rates are so low, is that every guest makers their own bed.'

Their lowest cost vacation yet.

'I know the recession is expected to boost English tourism, but I still think you're being optimistic.'

"Stop complaining, it was cheap and guaranteed to be hot all year around."

"I know what the airlines charge to check a bag is outrageous, but. . ."

"Dad, I need $5 for the annual debate team adventure camp."

Expensive greeting cards.

"I'm sorry, sir, but that country has been wiped out by runaway debt."

"Tell me once more how much we're saving on gas!"

'The flight is 99p...but it's another £456 if you want to be inside the plane!'

'I know more people are having to holiday at home...but do they all have to come to ours.'

Bed n Breakfast $50/Cot and Croissant $25.

"I want to go on a real vacation this year! Why do you have to be so cheap?"

"Travelling coach doesn't take longer...it just feels it!"

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Unable to raise enough money for a trip to Paris, the Bartlesville High French Club had to settle for three days in Tulsa.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

'He must be going economy!'

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

'They're alright if you like Charlie Chaplin inflight movies.'

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

Cheapskate Cruises

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"