Budget Airlines Pillows

"At these prices, what do you expect?"

"That will be £3 for the flight. Would you like the optional £456 inside seat?"

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

Unable to raise enough money for a trip to Paris, the Bartlesville High French Club had to settle for three days in Tulsa.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

"I just..."

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

'He must be going economy!'

'Can I ask you what you've had to eat this morning, Sir? . . .Have you evacuated your bowels since then? . . . I'm afraid I'll have to charge you for the additional weight.'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

'And, at those prices, we have two wheel well seats available.'

"It was rated on all the travel websites. 'Best economy tour'."

An airplane with a sardine can opener instead of a door

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'

'They're alright if you like Charlie Chaplin inflight movies.'

"This is the last time I let you handle our vacation plans, you cheapskate."

Expensive greeting cards.

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

'Any other husband would hire two pairs of skis.'

World's cheapest car

Airline Mergers.

Due to recent cutbacks, several major airlines have eliminated their snack carts.

"Rome was great – aside from the roaming fees."

"They become aggressive when you recline them."

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

'I'm sorry, sir, but there is a 25 surcharge to use the lavatory,'

Europe on $5000 a day.

Excess Baggage: Many hotels, inspired by the airlines are gouging their guests by adding 'resort fees' to the room rates.

Andy's first airplane experience was marred by his grandmother's stinginess

"For an extra charge, your flight can come with angst and insecurity."