Budget Conscious Collector Gifts

Budget tattoos.

"These are the principal qualities we're looking for in our new recruits."

'This is a wind-up, isn't it?'

Sale.

'Stamp collecting has gotten more competitive.'

Crisis Buzz.

"Got any cards saying friendship is priceless under 5 bucks?"

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

"The keep saying unrestored and what a nice PATINA, Ted. A better-sounding word for old tarnished stuff would be SCRINCH or SKRITCH, don't you think, eh, Ted?"

Garage Music

I'd like to request a transfer to a household offering a higher allowance and fewer choices.

"No one can afford to eat us anymore."

Over-reaction Man.

Quicksand Swamp - Cheap Burial Plots.

'Before we unload him, he'd like a written price support.'

"You've got two more things to worry about now. You're mad and I'm expensive."

Dear Mr Rembrandt, thanks for the link to the server where the data of your painting is located. I have transferred the 45.000 euros. Trading on NFT platforms is not as dubious as some old-fashioned folks say.

Affordable housing

Low income vampires.

'Haven't they ever heard of walls around here?'

'If the 750ml and th 375ml of the '82 Beaumont are too pricey, how about their Merlot-scented auto air freshener? -- Only 99 cents.'

Rx. Warning: May cause sudden loss of income.

'Jim gets a powerful charge from electric cars but always gets burned by the sticker shock.'

A Room (with adequate light and ventilation, no psychotic neighbors, near a grocery store, in a halfway-decent building in an O.K. neighborhood [not Queens, please God] for under $2000 a month) of One's Own

'He saved stamps for thirty years, then one day he was in the mail and gone.'

Dad she's fallen into the cereal again!

'At these prices I won't be able to say much!'

January Sales

Avocado Prices

"THREE quid for a romantic verse? Don't you have any snappy one liners for 50p.?"

'No, it's not a new iPhone, it's a Swiss army knife.'

"Our goal is to make prices so low that even our employees could shop here."

"Natasha cuts diagnosis costs."

Auction parking: Winners/Losers

'Computer Prices' blowing away you money