Budget-conscious Enthusiast Gifts

'Haven't they ever heard of walls around here?'

"If anyone objects to this 'cut price' wedding, let him speak now or call at weekend cheap rate."

Wine Selection 'Here we are. Our cheapest house wine. Would the gentleman care to smell the twisty cap?'

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

'No, you can't just watch the end of Bargainhunt!'

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

DIY marriage counseling.

Online Shopping.

'Let's go home and come back next year. It's Ground Hog Deficit!'

'They never quite finished it - it was probably over budget.'

The spend is high

"No one can afford to eat us anymore."

'You're clearly not well, just keep taking these until we run out of them.'

'I like the jib of their cuts.'

"I'm afraid your allowance didn't survive the latest round of budget cuts."

Family planning - 'I was thinking something low maintenance.'

We don't have a budget to redo the last guy's business cards, door placard, and so on, so would you mind assuming his identity in the meantime?

"They weren't doing a two for one on moisturisers, low fat yogurt or muesli then!!"

'Of course, that bid's just an estimate.'

"Could you hold off clipping your coupons until I've finished reading the paper?"

'With the price of petrol, I had to take on a second job to pay for the petrol to drive to my first job!'

"There is such a thing as a free lunch-it just tastes bad."

How to make sure he won't see his shadow.

Bargains

"No wonder it was so affordable."

"But if we didn't measure things we wouldn't know how good we were at measuring the things that we're measuring!"

"Oh no. It's another death caused by 'economy pack syndrome'!"

Low income vampires.

I brake for all 50 off Sales.

Final clearance sale.

sale

"If only there was a thesaurus for numbers."

Tony Blair - EU budget.

Affordable housing