British Royalty Fan Gifts

Queen Anne

"The peasants are revolting Sire."

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

TV jester.

Photos of Queen Elizabeth II

"She wishes to range free!"

King on the toilet whilst jester laughs because the toilet paper is out of reach.

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

'I'd think you'd be used to having a moat by now.'

'The King of what?'

Oh, wait - Their king posted a declaration of war on your Facebook wall this morning.

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

'Look, Carl, the glory days are over. You might want to slip into something a little more comfortable.'

'It's in my belly-button if you must know!'

'Yes, he definitely wants something. . . maybe his crown and scepter.'

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

King and Jester

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

'Under blood type, sir, could you be a little more specific than blue?'

'I'll have your head on a platter.'

Reign Man

'Could you scoot your chair over this way a little dear?'

The Royal Wii.

"And His Majesty sends you a great big kiss, too."

'I know that you think you should be the President of this company, Your Majesty. But, you'll just have to work your way up, like I did!'

"You're unlikely to find anyplace on the market that is truly impregnable."

'One can see the baby's crown!'

"One blackbird pizza?"

'Why round? Why not square? Or rectangle? Or a triangle? Or . . . '

'Your Majesty, the peasants are out of bread!', 'Then let them eat low-carb stuff.'

'I know it seems like a war, but it's actually an all-out struggle for peace!'

"...and if any of you are opposed to my being king of the snake pit, raise your hands now!"

'You're going to make the railroads run on time? -- Since when do we have railroads?'

"'Happily ever after' you want? Then you keep the house kosher!"

"She leaked WHAT to the press?"