Breakfast Pioneer Gifts

It's the little surprises that keep a marriage exciting...

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

"Larry, what's the weather forecast?" "Let me ask you something. Did you make waffles this morning? Because someone had maple syrup on their hands, and I seem to recall a hand moving me... a pretty, pretty, pretty sticky hand..."

Power breakfast.

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

It was then that Cervantes was inspired.

"You're close, but you're not the record. The record for one family in one booth—all from out of state, each ordering a complete breakfast—was set in 1978, with fifteen."

'Mom! Instant oatmeal is NOT fast food!'

'Do you want toast with that?'

'It's one of those trendy 'warm salads,' with sausage, fried eggs, bacon and black pudding.'

Sugar Crunchies - Free Dental Treatment.

Devilled Eggs

1% Cereal: Now with marshmallow dollar signs.

"Nice landing, Captain Crunch."

"The toaster is broken again, sweetheart."

Punkcakes

'Mom, I don't care how high in fiber they are. Broccoli flakes are going to fail as a breakfast cereal.'

'We're starting a new diet today -- do you want your tofu scrambled or fried?'

"You confused the Sudso box with the Cruncho box."

'Shredded wheat cereal, cracked wheat toast, and crushed pineapple. I didn't do it. It came that way.'

"Well, make up your mind! Does it suck or is it cool?"

Wife at breakfast: 'We're out of sugar - how about chocolate milk on your cereal?'

"Honey, the toaster is down, but it's already alerted the oven to pre-heat and broil your muffins."

Have you seen this toaster?

Parkour Breakfast

'Madge, did we really need a home computer to make scrambled eggs?'

'Hey, milk!'

'That's why it's called a full English breakfast.'

"It's the perfect online start-up. We'll sell bricks and mortar."

'Well, lucky you! The chef informs me that his breakfast special today is blackened scrambled eggs!'