Breakfast Pioneer Pillows

It's the little surprises that keep a marriage exciting...

'Before I order breakfast, which way is it to the 'International Bathroom of Pancakes'?'

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

"Larry, what's the weather forecast?" "Let me ask you something. Did you make waffles this morning? Because someone had maple syrup on their hands, and I seem to recall a hand moving me... a pretty, pretty, pretty sticky hand..."

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

Power breakfast.

It was then that Cervantes was inspired.

"You're close, but you're not the record. The record for one family in one booth—all from out of state, each ordering a complete breakfast—was set in 1978, with fifteen."

'Do you want toast with that?'

'Mom! Instant oatmeal is NOT fast food!'

'It's one of those trendy 'warm salads,' with sausage, fried eggs, bacon and black pudding.'

Sugar Crunchies - Free Dental Treatment.

1% Cereal: Now with marshmallow dollar signs.

"The toaster is broken again, sweetheart."

'Is this the new product?' - 'Yes, a rocket filled with cornflakes.'

Devilled Eggs

"Nice landing, Captain Crunch."

Punkcakes

F&E Diner. You asked for a hot breakfast, so I put some jalapenos on your corn flakes!

'Mom, I don't care how high in fiber they are. Broccoli flakes are going to fail as a breakfast cereal.'

'We're starting a new diet today -- do you want your tofu scrambled or fried?'

"You confused the Sudso box with the Cruncho box."

Chef Contest. Ernie, it's not sporting to chant "batter, batter, batter" during a pancake cook-off.

'Shredded wheat cereal, cracked wheat toast, and crushed pineapple. I didn't do it. It came that way.'

Wife at breakfast: 'We're out of sugar - how about chocolate milk on your cereal?'

"Honey, the toaster is down, but it's already alerted the oven to pre-heat and broil your muffins."

Parkour Breakfast

Have you seen this toaster?

'Hey, milk!'

'That's why it's called a full English breakfast.'

"Well, make up your mind! Does it suck or is it cool?"

'Madge, did we really need a home computer to make scrambled eggs?'

'Well, lucky you! The chef informs me that his breakfast special today is blackened scrambled eggs!'