Breakfast Jokers Pillows

"You'll be late for work, hurry up and smoke your breakfast!"

'Before I order breakfast, which way is it to the 'International Bathroom of Pancakes'?'

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

"Introducing the Schultzaccino. Neither tea nor coffee."

'I want a big breakfast.. there are a lot of contended female cats in the neighborhood this morning.'

Receiving the early-morning T-mail.

"The 'Ex' huh?"

"Don't rush me! I won't be much of a busy bee if I don't get my second cup of coffee."

'This corn's got dandruff.'

Egg Armour Plating

'I ordered a blueberry muffin - Not a Blackberry muffin!'

Instant human... just add coffee

Have you said grace? No, we said grace yesterday, this is leftovers!

Cow sneezes milk at breakfast.

'One slice of toast and a bottle of ketchup, please.'

'Ah! Breakfast in bed.'

Censorship.

Dried Herbs

'The cereal killer has struck again, Sarge.'

'That's strange -- there seems to be a pop-tart in your disk drive.'

'Typical, next door gets an image of Jesus on their toast, and we get Richard Branson!'

"...Who ordered the ham and cheese on banana bread?"

'I'm gonna tell Mom you ate a bad word!'

Vocal Fry

'Is it too early to start driving you out of your mind?'

Smoke gets in your eyes.

"Go ahead. It's decaf."

'Bobby, help me mush this down so we can convince your mother it's a pancake tomorrow morning.'

'Wonderful, Ngok! Really great! What did the shaman tell you about stoneburgers and rock nuggets?'

'If you haven't got a low fat, organic, calorie free, ethically produced, free range option... I'll have the double chocolate cheesecake.'

What, you've never seen coffee with a worm in it? The Too-Early Bird.

"I'm making moatmeal. Do you want some?"

"I thought you said you wanted these sunnyside up?"

I knew those onion rings would be the end of me.

'If you have a referee in Football, what do you have in bowls?'