Breakfast Humourist Pillows

'One slice of toast and a bottle of ketchup, please.'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'Before I order breakfast, which way is it to the 'International Bathroom of Pancakes'?'

Cake Free Zone

'Missed again, eh, Bob? Maybe you should switch to decaf!'

Slices of bread rescuing burnt toast.

'You've had enough!'

"Of course I've been drinking!"

"It's choux pastry, not shoe pastry!"

'How do you feel when you get up in the morning?' 'Amazed!'

'I want a big breakfast.. there are a lot of contended female cats in the neighborhood this morning.'

"I'm your surrogate mother, son. I just provided the oven."

"Welcome to The Cable Cafe. Your waiter will be with you between now and 5:00PM."

'This decaf's lousy.'

"Hey, Gary. Lois wanted to know if you’re up for waiting forever for reheated leftovers and sipping warm mimosas intended to ease the pain of poor service amid a cacophony of idiot tourists and 20-year-olds... you know, brunch."

'Looks like another typical caffeine overdose.'

'Sorry, Bob, but I'm having trouble taking our relationship seriously.'

"Well, team....time to trade our 'You Got This!' coffee mugs to the 'Mistakes Were Made' mugs."

How do you take your eggs? Like I take my relationships with women: over. Breakfast Menu.

Menu From The Luxury Home of Pancakes

"Why didn't you think of that before I put on the icing?"

'This corn's got dandruff.'

"Our breakfast burrito is just like our lunch burrito, except it contains 876 mgs of caffeine."

To make your computer faster, please pour two cups of Espresso into your CD drive.

'What time is it? The small hand is on the 6 and the cat's paw is on my chin.'

Tea Cup Ride

'The thought of your biscuits brings a lump to my throat.'

Heirlooms of Tomorrow

'Waiter, a café with chairs, tables and two coffees please!'

'I ordered a blueberry muffin - Not a Blackberry muffin!'

Instant human... just add coffee

Cow sneezes milk at breakfast.

'That's strange -- there seems to be a pop-tart in your disk drive.'

Clocks. Why do you want two alarm clocks? Getting up is bad news and I want a second opinion.

"Ladies ladies, please. There's enough of me to go around."