Breakfast Humourist Gifts

'One slice of toast and a bottle of ketchup, please.'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'Missed again, eh, Bob? Maybe you should switch to decaf!'

Cake Free Zone

"Of course I've been drinking!"

'You've had enough!'

"It's choux pastry, not shoe pastry!"

'How do you feel when you get up in the morning?' 'Amazed!'

'I want a big breakfast.. there are a lot of contended female cats in the neighborhood this morning.'

"I'm your surrogate mother, son. I just provided the oven."

'This decaf's lousy.'

"Hey, Gary. Lois wanted to know if you’re up for waiting forever for reheated leftovers and sipping warm mimosas intended to ease the pain of poor service amid a cacophony of idiot tourists and 20-year-olds... you know, brunch."

"Welcome to The Cable Cafe. Your waiter will be with you between now and 5:00PM."

'Looks like another typical caffeine overdose.'

'This corn's got dandruff.'

Menu From The Luxury Home of Pancakes

"Well, team....time to trade our 'You Got This!' coffee mugs to the 'Mistakes Were Made' mugs."

"Why didn't you think of that before I put on the icing?"

"Our breakfast burrito is just like our lunch burrito, except it contains 876 mgs of caffeine."

'Sorry, Bob, but I'm having trouble taking our relationship seriously.'

To make your computer faster, please pour two cups of Espresso into your CD drive.

'What time is it? The small hand is on the 6 and the cat's paw is on my chin.'

Heirlooms of Tomorrow

'The thought of your biscuits brings a lump to my throat.'

Tea Cup Ride

'Waiter, a café with chairs, tables and two coffees please!'

Instant human... just add coffee

"Ladies ladies, please. There's enough of me to go around."

'That's strange -- there seems to be a pop-tart in your disk drive.'