Breakfast Comedian Gifts

'I'm gonna tell Mom you ate a bad word!'

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

"Nobody truly appreciates the magic that goes into a good omelet."

'I thought chemistry experiments were after lunch.'

'Bless this food we are about to receive, all except the broccoli. Bless the apple pie twice.'

'We like bright, new employees who aren't afraid to take some risks. By the way... how are those clam fritters?'

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?" "Sure." "Can you warm this one up? Maybe sprinkle some cinnamon and sugar on it, and maybe make it three biscuits?" "You sure this is for your dog?" "Can you also sprinkle a little turkey on it?"

"Guess we are going to the coffee shop!"

'I want a big breakfast.. there are a lot of contended female cats in the neighborhood this morning.'

'I'm on my break, Sam... I'll call you back when I start work.'

"The project must be failing! The manager just suggested I take all the credit for it!"

"J'entends le poulet qui arrive!"

'The doctor said I was ready for solids, but not this solid!'

'This decaf's lousy.'

'Are salary increases automaric, or do I have to work for them?'

"Some people call me a ball-buster, but I prefer cojones-crusher."

'This corn's got dandruff.'

'No, he's right. Cows have three udders. One for skim milk, one for two percent and the third one's for lactose free.'

"Our breakfast burrito is just like our lunch burrito, except it contains 876 mgs of caffeine."

'What's your favourite meal?' 'Seconds.'

"I like to keep my option open."

"Whoa! Just decaf today. I only had 15 hours of sleep yesterday."

'What do you mean you're a vegetarian?'

'Okay children, who knows the actions to I'm A Little Espresso Machine?'

"It's my in-tray!"

"Ho ordered the Cafe au Lait?"

"Is that decaf?"

Instant human... just add coffee

'It's called ‘Shared Risk.' You taste the Okra Casserole and I'll try the Tuna Surprise.'

'One slice of toast and a bottle of ketchup, please.'

"Principal Gomez! What are you doing here? Don't you in your office."